


Please, Stay,

by Liza0111



Category: Heavy Rain
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, M/M, Norman bottoms, Northan, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-15
Packaged: 2019-06-10 17:13:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15296241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liza0111/pseuds/Liza0111
Summary: It is perhaps not the best time to be thinking about this.Norman thinks to himself absentmindedly as the man behind him thrusts into him steadily.But damn, he wishes he can stop himself from running away from his feelings for once.





	Please, Stay,

  
_Ethan went out and bought new bed sheets._ Norman catches himself staring at the way his hand is curling up against the soft fabric, pressing his lips tightly to stop himself from releasing a wanton moan when he feels fingers being pressed inside his body. He wonders when Ethan got these bed sheets; he doesn’t recall seeing them in the past. The architect probably found a new need for changing bed sheets more frequently ever since……well, since this started to happen on a regular basis.

 

 _What is the time right now, must be after 8 already……He shouldn’t stay too long. Ethan has to wake up early tomorrow to pick Shaun up from Grace’s……_ Norman’s concentration is once again broken by another wave of sensation excites his nerves. Ethan is pushing another finger into him, causing his body to jolt forward. “Norman,” Here comes the concerned voice of the older man.“Is this okay?”

 

Ethan married his high school sweetheart, needless to say he doesn’t have the vastest romantic experience, let alone being with a man. Part of that probably contributes to his anxiety when he is doing this sort of thing with Norman. Always considerate and caring, Ethan seems to constantly worry that he is doing something wrong or hurting him somehow.  “No, it’s fine.” Norman tries as hard as he can to maintain control of his voice. “It feels good, Ethan.” It is embarrassing to admit, but he needs to reassure Ethan. And he is absolutely speaking the truth, too. Without having to look back, Norman can picture the look of relief on Ethan’s face when he hears his words.

 

He knows about Ethan more than he should from working the case, a thought that always sends a pang of shame and guilt into his heart. He feels like he invaded Ethan’s privacy, even though there was really no way he could have avoided learning more about the father with Ethan becoming the prime suspect at one point. He wonders what it would have been like if he and Ethan had met in a different way. Some way that doesn’t involve Shaun getting kidnapped and kept under a well for days and Ethan getting physically and psychologically tortured. Anything but that.

 

_He shouldn’t be thinking about this, dwelling on the could-be’s and what-if’s never does anyone any good._

 

_Besides, Ethan Mars is……_

 

"Haaa......Ah!" Norman finally cries out when Ethan touches him _right there_ , exactly where he wants to be touched. His crook finger is probing inside of him, applying pressure on the spot that makes his knees go weak and his head a dizzy mess. He can’t help but to pant helplessly as Ethan focuses on pleasuring him with his fingers. A thin layer of tears blurs his vision and his face sinks deeper into the pillow in front of him, his face flushed and his body heated. “Ahh _……_ Ethan……” He tries to fight the urge but fails miserably; his body craves the contact badly. Within minutes Norman is moving his hips along the rhythm of Ethan’s hand, pressing himself against his fingers to be touched at the same place again.

 

“Norman……” Ethan’s voice sounds strained, his desires unmasked. He retracts his fingers when he feels the brunet is ready for him, and Norman lets out a soft whimper in response. “Norman, can I?” He always asks so hesitantly, like he is prepared to be rejected by him at anytime. By now Ethan Mars should know that is unlikely to happen, but he still maintain the same tentative demeanor. It really hurts Norman to think about that, especially when all he wants to do is to hold Ethan’s face and kiss him hard. But he knows he can’t. _He can’t._

 

“Yes, Ethan.” Norman replies hoarsely, his voice thick with wants that are too filthy to be said. He always think about how much he shouldn’t be doing this, but he falls back to the same path that led him here in the first place. He grasps the bed sheet mindlessly, wishing he can focus on something else other than how hard he is, or how much he wants Ethan to just put it in him, pressing him down on the bed and filling him up and making him cry out in lust—

 

“I want you, Ethan, please _……_ ”

 

He doesn’t have to wait long, because Ethan wants this just as badly, if not more. Norman shivers when he feels Ethan’s cock brushing against his entrance, his throat making more keening noises that entice Ethan to fuck him. The architect grabs his hips and thrusts forward, burying his length into the FBI profiler. “Haaah……! Ethan……!” He thrashes on the bed, crying out and nearly cumming just from being penetrated by the older man. He can hear a soft grunt from Ethan as he makes shallow thrusts, pushing against the tightness of Norman’s body. “Norman, you okay……?” Ethan breathes against the shell of Norman’s ear, and his face immediately becomes hotter than it already was. His entire body feels like it is burning, with Ethan’s body heat enveloping him. He whines when the man gently places his hand over his clenched fist, as if he is trying to sooth him. “Relax for me, Norman, you feel so good……”

 

The honest and earnest compliment, in addition to Ethan’s overwhelming commitment to please him, makes all of this so much more difficult. It is impossible, _impossible_ to not succumb to his affection. The young agent whimpers and moans when Ethan grabs his waist and rams into him hard. Norman is beyond thankful that Shaun isn’t at his father’s house right now, because he is certainly inadequate in controlling the volume of his voice.

 

Norman can’t stop himself from wanting all of Ethan Mars. His knees can barely support his weight and his entire frame is trembling from the continuous stream pleasure. Ethan is stretching him out so deliciously, fucking him just the way to make him melt, the younger man have no way of resisting opening himself to him. He is grinding against Ethan, his lips quivering when the man starts to jerk him off, moaning feverishly as he is brought closer to his limit.

 

 _It is perhaps not the best time to be thinking about this._ Norman thinks to himself absentmindedly as the man thrusts into him steadily.

 

_But damn, he wishes he can stop himself from running away from his feelings for once._

 

He cries out loudly as he climaxes, white liquid shooting over the bed sheets. He hears Ethan groan behind him, penetrating him deeply before releasing inside him and filling him full. Norman collapses onto the bed as Ethan catches his breath and slowly pulls out of him. His heart rate is still going way above the normal range and his head is pounding. Ethan Mars has a way to always make him lose his cool.

 

Usually, Ethan would give him a soft kiss or two on the cheek while he slowly gathers his energy to start heading to the bathroom to clean up. Today is somehow different. Norman is thoroughly surprised when Ethan places a hand on his bare shoulder and gently flips him over. Instantly, he can feel his body tensing up, and his breath quickens as he faces Ethan’s kind blue eyes.

 

It is always harder when he sees those eyes. Beautifully sincere to the point he always can’t bear to look at them.

 

“Norman,” Ethan begins, his hand roaming over Norman’s pale skin, brushing against his sensitive sides. “What are you thinking about right now?”

 

“I……” His incoherent thought is interrupted by Ethan’s unexpected actions. Norman shivers as Ethan grabs his knees and pulls them apart, “Ethan, you……” His breathing hitched when Ethan slips a finger into the very spot he had just used a few minutes ago, the tight entrance that was filled with _him_. His arousal is being awaken with Ethan’s teasing, and a heavy blush clouds over his face. “Ethan……!”

 

Norman can feel the liquids inside him slowly trailing down as Ethan starts to finger him. His face grows hotter. “Ahhh _……_! shit _……_ Ethan……!” He twiddles uncomfortably, hips bucking up as he finds himself getting incredibly turned on again. How does Ethan do this to him so easily?

 

“Norman,” Ethan speaks his name as if he is reciting a sacred vow. The younger man gasps and throws his head back as Ethan grabs his hips and buries himself into him once more. The architect presses his body closer to him, kissing him so passionately that he is sure that his brain shut down for a brief moment.

 

Norman hesitates for a second before resigning and wrapping his arms around Ethan’s back. His moaning replaces his words, his cries freely escaping his throat. As he closes his eyes, Ethan’s unanswered question lingers in his head.

 

_Norman, what are you thinking about right now?_

 

 

_Ethan. Ethan._

_I am thinking about you, Ethan. I am thinking about you._

 

 

 

 

 

“You don’t have to leave right away.” Ethan says as Norman steps out of the bathroom, hair still dripping with water. Norman gives him a tired smile and starts putting on his shirt. “I should go. You have to pick Shaun up early tomorrow.”

 

“It’s not a problem at all, there is enough space on the bed—” Ethan persists. Norman waves a hand dismissively. “It’s really fine, Ethan, I’ve got work to do in D.C. anyway.”

 

Ethan’s shoulders drop. He runs his hand through his hair, frustration manifesting for a mere second before an expression of defeat sets in. Norman can feel guilt closing up on his throat, and he looks away in shame.

 

_I am sorry._

 

_I wish I can stay, too._

 

“Norman.” Ethan sighs resignedly, “You do know that _……_ I only do this with you, right?”

 

 _Of course I know. Goddamn, Ethan. As if I would ever believe you would share this kind of intimacy with just anyone._ The FBI profiler doesn’t reply. He stares at the white carpet beneath his feet, his mind fighting off the desire to say everything he wants to say. Silence fills the room.

 

The father gazes at him for answer. He can tell that Ethan has not quite given up yet.

 

“Why do you keep trying to remove yourself from me?” Ethan asks softly. One step at a time, he inches closer to Norman, until he can finally holds his hand ever so tenderly. “You don’t have to do that, Norman. You can stay here. Unless you don’t want to be around me. This house always welcomes you.”

 

 _Stop it. Please._ Norman chews on the inside of his bottom lip, feeling his eyes burning up and his resolve weakening. “It’s not _……_ you, Ethan. It’s me.” He whispers, “Trust me, you are better off without me. It’s already selfish of me to keep coming back.”

 

“That’s not true.” Ethan’s voice raises a little, yet it still remains soothing. “You saved me, you saved my son. How could you think you are not good for me?”

 

Norman knows he should spare Ethan the pitiful details of his life, but he can’t bring himself to push the man away anymore. Ethan’s arms are now around him, trying to warm him up after his cold shower. Just fifteen minutes ago, he started to feel the shakes again.

 

“Ethan, I……I am not good for anybody. I keep messing up and going back on my old ways and destroying myself, I can’t risk dragging you down with me, I can’t……” Norman shakes his head weakly, fully aware he is not making a whole lot of sense, but Ethan is still listening to him intently. Those blue eyes are watching him with a mixture of pain and protectiveness that he surely doesn't deserve. “You are too good, you and Shaun. You deserve some peace and rest after all that happen……I would ruin that for you, Ethan.”

 

“What if I tell you I don’t mind that?” Ethan says quietly, his embrace tightening slightly. “I want to be here for you, Norman. I want to accept all of you, please……”

 

Norman wants to run out the door, to walk in a bar and drink till he can’t remember just how much he wants to be part of Ethan Mars’ life. But how can he when he knows what a mess he really is? To bring that kind of burden into the life of a man as kind as Ethan would be a crime he can never forgive himself for. He tried so desperately to stay away, focusing on everything but his affection for Ethan, naively thinking that would work. He kept coming back to Philadelphia because he can't ignore Ethan's heartfelt text messages and calls, and god knows he was dying of loneliness in Washington.

 

It hurts terribly whenever he pictures someone else in Ethan's arms, being on the receiving end of Ethan's kisses and affection, but somehow, that still hurts less than the thought that allowing himself to fall in love with Ethan could potentially harm Ethan in the long run.

 

He is hopelessly in love with Ethan Mars. He wants to hold him and kiss him more than anything in this world. He thought his love for Ethan can conquer anything, he knows he has to get better before he can pursue a future with him, but how can he look at Ethan in the eyes and tell him that he had tried to quit Tripto three times now and relapsed on his every attempt? He wanted to do it for Ethan so badly, so he can finally smile at him proudly and finally hug him with no reservation, but he failed. He failed himself and he failed Ethan and Shaun.

 

“Ethan……I have……problems……” His voice begins to falter, thin threads barely holding him together threatening to break. “I am not worthy for you, and I definitely shouldn’t be around your son.” His hand instinctively reaches for his shirt pocket, where he keeps the tube of Triptocaine. This is how pathetic he is. His addiction is so severe that he brought drugs to see his crush in case he starts having withdrawals again.

 

In Norman’s surprise, Ethan takes his hand, and holds it firmly, refusing to let go. “I know, Norman, I know.” He whispers, “Norman, I might not be a FBI profiler, but I am not oblivious. Whatever it is, I promise I won’t judge you on it, please believe me, Norman, believe me.” His tone is close to begging, and Norman’s heart starts to throb in pain when Ethan brings his hand to his lips and kisses them lovingly. “I am asking you this because I am in love with you, Norman Jayden, and nothing will stop me from loving you.”

 

“Ethan……” Norman sniffles, finally letting his tears drip down his face, the walls around him crumpling to the ground. He has been alone for so long, is it really alright for him to accept love from the one he loves the most? “I think……I have a lot to explain.” He leans into Ethan’s touch and whispers tiredly. There is ARI, how his addiction with Tripto started, the hallucinations……These are all heavy subjects. But for some reason, he feels more at ease now. Maybe it’s because Ethan is smiling at him so warmly and there is not a hint of doubt found in him.

 

 

“Yes, and I am here to listen.” Ethan wipes the tears off Norman’s face, planting soft kisses on his damp skin until he starts to laugh and smiles back at him shyly. In those radiant green eyes, Ethan sees a renewed sense of hope rising in Norman. As the younger man gathers the courage to slowly cup his face and let their lips touch once again the way he wanted all along, Ethan holds him close and vows in his heart that he will never let that hope get away from Norman anymore.

 

 

“—Whenever you are ready, Norman.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I love them so much it physically hurts


End file.
